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| by Timmy Walnuts | January 29th, 2009 - 10:45 am
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I’ve been an advocate of the Xbox 360 since its launch back in November of 2005, falling quickly in love with titles like Fight Night Round 3, DOA 4, and Need for Speed: Most Wanted. I’d defend its small hardware shortcomings with Sony devotees, and I’d laugh and shoot milk out my nose (which was weird, because I’m lactose intolerant) when Nintendo fanboys would attempt to argue the Wii has better games. I even supported the 360 after I not only received the “red ring of death,” but soon after that one was replaced, the new console began to scratch my games in circular patterns, which meant another replacement. Even then I did not falter in my praise for the console.
Yet, my confidence is failing in you my sweet, sweet Microsoft. With the onslaught of high profile demos and much desired downloadable content, I’ve been on Xbox Live Marketplace like a fiend. However, downloading content has been an aggravating experience. In order to understand this, we need to rewind about a month ago. The ripoff that was the Jedi temple DLC for Star Wars: The Force Unleashed was released and being an advocate of the game, I was very excited. I turned on my system, went to the marketplace, spent my $12.50 for 1000 MP, and promptly began downloading my DLC. Everything is going fine, then we get to 89%. It freezes up. I cancel, delete partial file from HDD, try again. Same thing, but earlier in the progress bar. Rinse and repeat many times, and long story short, Xbox Live support tells me I have to format my hard drive. Well shit. I know that deletes all my saves. At that time, after the holiday grind, I was swamped with titles, and clearing my HDD sounded more like “go fuck yourself” to me. In order to format and keep my files, I would need a memory card and mind you, a memory card that will hold over 400 MB of data. Now thats a $55 dollar price tag, one I was reluctant to pay, but found a store with a returns policy that allowed for opened accessories to be returned within a week. I move everything, format, and move everything back. I download the DLC from SW:FU (awfully short, by the way), and ta-da, it works.
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| by Timmy Walnuts | January 27th, 2009 - 9:37 am
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Are you seriously reading this shit? GO PLAY OPERATION: ANCHORAGE
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| by Danny Internets | January 22nd, 2009 - 12:37 pm
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I don’t browse Craigslist often, but it’s things like this that make me think I should start:
http://seattle.craigslist.org/sno/rnr/993581081.html
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Reply to: pers-993581081@craigslist.org
Date: 2009-01-14, 11:50PM PST
To the woman that crapped in my car… (NE Portland)
We met on Craigslist so I am hoping that this post finds you. I know that it could quite possibly be the most humiliating first date that you have ever been on, but I am willing to look past that.
I thought we had chemistry sitting at McMenamins sharing that basket of Cajun Tots while drinking the Terminator Stout. I really felt like there was a connection there. I found you to be intelligent and witty and looked forward to further conversation with you.
At some point in life, everyone has gambled on a fart and lost. It just happened to be on a first date in the passenger seat of my car. Please don’t feel bad. The package I sent you with Pepto the next day and the note that said “First dates are always a crap shoot. Call me” was meant to be funny, not offensive.
I have gambled on a fart and lost on multiple occasions. The first time I did it was very memorable. It happened when I was five and sitting on my uncle’s lap. I am lactose intolerant, but love cheese. I probably win 95% of the time, but I don’t think anyone wins 100% of the time. That’s why they call it “gambling”. I’m the last person to judge you for crapping your pants. In fact, I am impressed by your boldness. The timing on the other hand, could have been a tad bit better…like when you’re not sitting on a heated leather seat…
What I am trying to say is that if you want to go out again, I would be more than happy to take you someplace where we can get a meal that is high in fiber and less taxing on the digestive tract.
I await your call,
Tad
P.S. - If you shat yourself on purpose to end the evening early…Touché… |
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| by Timmy Walnuts | January 21st, 2009 - 12:28 pm
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So it’s finally happened. The MMO genre has gotten so godforsakenly large that every game developer/publisher and their mothers think they can produce a smash hit and rake the mounds of cash in. And its hard to argue with them. With World of Warcraft breaching the 11 million players mark just a couple weeks back and competitors such as Warhammer Online, Lord of the Rings Online, and Star Wars: The Old Republic on the horizon, its no surprise a lot of companies are trying their hand at competing with the best. However, as time has shown, the beast that is WoW will not go down easily, if it ever does. Yet, Namco Bandai (huh?) is taking their turn with hopes that a predominent anime series cultivates enough of a following to give them an edge over Blizzard. The series? Dragonball.
What? Ex-squeeze me? Baking powder? They’re making an MMO with hopes that a manga/anime, besides a new special introducing Vegeta’s younger brother (are you kidding me?), that hasn’t seen new content in over a decade, will attract enough gamers to produce a viable experience? A special that was created just a few months ago, most likely to promote the game’s release and an anime, mind you, that had poor animation and ridiculous, asinine, repeating storylines that only a ten year old could find entertaining. Now, don’t start flaming the forums yet. Dragonball, as a series, was a building block for many modern animes, as well as a pioneer in japanamation in the western world. I’d be lying if I told you that I don’t know who Goku, Frieza, Vegeta and Majin Buu are, but then again, I was also a ten-year-old action-addicted kid when the episodes were being dubbed into English. And it was that fast paced action and glitzy transformation that mesmerized me as a boy, even leaving a soft spot in its wake, though one that has been rapidly hardening over the years. Read the rest of this entry »
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